THE WORST NOVEL OPENING LINE CONTEST
Every year San Jose State University holds its Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest (also called "It was a dark and stormy night" contest) for the worst opening line for a novel. This year's winner was penned by Jim Guigli from Carmichael CA. It reads:
Detective Bart Lasiter was in his office studying the light from his one small window falling on his super burrito when the door swung open to reveal a woman whose body said you've had your last burrito for a while, whose face said angels did exist, and whose eyes said she could make you dig your own grave and lick the shovel clean.
If you'd like to see some of the other entries go to: http://www.sjsu.edu/depts/english/2006.htm